To wrap up this blog, it is only natural to write about how my experience in Oaxaca has changed me.
An article stated, “The first thing that college is for is to teach you to think. That doesn’t simply mean developing the mental skills particular to individual disciplines. College is an opportunity to stand outside the world for a few years…contemplate things from a distance…through the act of establishing communication between the mind and the heart, the mind and experience, that you become an individual, a unique being—a soul. The job of college is to assist you to begin to do that.”
I’ve gained much knowledge described by the goals in the program course syllabus: health care systems, public health prevention work, cultural belief systems, indigenous medicine, prevalent diseases, and Latino health factors and issues. But more importantly, the health internship program in Oaxaca has definitely taught me how to think and how to be in individual.
My determination in being a doctor. Many people pointed out the boredom of a general physician’s consultations, especially when the diagnoses were similar–diagnose with throat inflammation, rest more, eat well, and drink water. I could understand why it may seem boring, since a physician’s day may be very mundane, but I still found the appointments with patients fun. Although patients may come in with similar symptoms and we would end up giving the similar diagnoses, every patient’s story is different. As a doctor, interacting with the patients mean getting to know them. We talk about their family, about their work, and of course, their health. Rather than being a blur of patients being seen, each patient becomes an interesting individual in my mind. Also, during surgery rotation in Hospital Civil, I stood for over five hours, but I didn’t mind at all; I found surgeries very fascinating. I loved the specificity of every cauterization, the intrigue of cutting through the different layers of tissues, the precise alignment of every surgical staple, the fluid stroke of each stitch, and the intense concentration of the surgeons. During the OBGYN rotations, the surgeries were quicker and more repetitious, granted, there is always a chance of complications during delivery. I was in shock at how a baby can just appear during a c-section and the roughness in grabbing the baby in a natural birth. But as soon as the staff presents the baby to the mother, in that first moment of recognition, I never failed to shed a tear. I always feel the strong wave of emotions at that first bonding–the mother feeling relief that the baby is fine, the smiles of recognition, the baby seeing the mother for the first time. I know about the little time doctors have with patients. I know about the many more years of schooling, studying, and testing. I know about the inconvenience of insurance policies and medical lawsuits. I know about the influence of politics on national health programs. My internship experiences allowed me to see the realities of a doctor’s daily schedule, good and bad, but nothing fazed me. I know the medical profession is not ideal, but I’m willing to sacrifice certain things in life to gain the joy of treating patients, the fulfillment of being their support, the privilege of walking in patients’ shoes through their anecdotes, and the satisfaction of seeing their smiles. I can interact and understand many diverse patients, treating them in the most effective manner. I have so much appreciation for this career.
Finding myself. There has been many ups and downs during my last two years in college. In that process, I’ve lost sight of my purpose, my joys, and my priorities. I shut out many people who cared. But ever since my mental state hit rock bottom, I stood back on my two feet with the help of others. Time can not rewind, but I’ve been trying to make up for the missed opportunities and the damaged connections with people. Besides being a chance to learn more about my career choice, the program was an opportunity to bond with nineteen other ambitious and fun-loving students. During the eleven weeks in Oaxaca, I chatted, studied, hiked, joked, laughed, cried, and even flew with these people. They became my new family in a foreign country. They were the people I turned to when I needed help. Rather than shutting people out, I learned to open up to them, tell them my troubles, and in turn, I tried to be their support too. I offered my help, my ears, my advice, my hugs, and I tried to be there for them. I know I’m an introvert and an adventurer, and although may solitary behavior may be weird or concerning for others, I learned that it’s okay to be myself and be by myself. At the same time, I should keep in touch with the people that care and reassure them that I’m fine. I am usually stubborn about events unraveling just as I plan, but I learned that rather being neurotic about my plans, I could relax, be flexible, and enjoy the present. Anyways, life always throws curveballs and things are never as planned!
My love for people. I remember one of my personal essays on the university application was about smiles. I loved doing anything to make people’s day better, and usually it doesn’t take too much. Just a helping hand, a greeting, or a smile will make others feel good. During college, I had a time when I was a workaholic. I only cared about academics, internships, and work. I neglected friends and many relationships deteriorated. I lost contact with many people and they moved on, while I stayed and withdrew in busywork. During this program, I was bound to fellow classmates, and that gave me time and the opportunity to really get to know everyone. I remembered my love for people–how I loved listening to their stories, hearing about their past, empathizing and understanding their stance, seeing their emotions, spending time with them, and being a part of their experiences. To me, every single person is a miracle–how they were conceived, how they were born, and how they were brought up. Everyone is so unique and I’m always in awe of what each person brings to the world: their perceptions, their work, their art, their influence, their love. My rekindled love for humankind pushes me more towards the medical profession, being able to heal and interact with so many people.
Empathy and cultural competency. Humans are diverse. One of our biggest differences is our culture. As a health care provider, I need cultural competency. During one of first few lectures, we analyzed American cultural patterns. In a diverse workplace, if an American works on a group project individually, coworkers from other cultures may not misinterpret the situation and think the person wouldn’t want to work with everyone else, though the person might have acted that way due to his/her culture’s emphasis on independence and hard work. Without cultural competency, many rifts separate groups of people and create a tense atmosphere. Another example, a doctor advises a patient to eat less grains and increase fruit and vegetable intake. However, when the patient returns, her glucose level is still borderline diabetic and the patient claims to have done as the doctor had advised. If a patient lies, understand why she is lying; maybe she doesn’t trust you, maybe she feels shame for not buying fruits. Perhaps she is financially incapable of buying fruits. If she is Latino, familismo is important and the provider might understand that she would rather spend money on her family rather than buy things for her own health. The lack of minority trained health professionals and general ignorance of cultural issues will continue to create health care barriers for the minority population. Cultural competency and clinical empathy allows for mutually beneficial and nonpaternalistic patient-doctor interactions. Doctors would learn much more about patients’ thoughts and concerns. Making connections with patients results in more accurate diagnosis and gives patients autonomy and a feeling of control over treatment.
Culture shock upon returning to the U.S. Finally, back to my steamed Chinese buns, my chewy boba, my steamed fish, vegetables, my car, my friends, my family! I’ve been getting a good dose of what I have missed the past eleven weeks. Home sweet home, right? However, I find myself unconsciously choosing things that remind me of Mexico. While I was choosing a meal from a grocery store before I board a bus back home, I scanned over the salads, sushi, and yogurt parfaits, my usual selection. I found my hand reaching out for the jalapeño ranch chicken wrap. Guess it really is hard to stop eating tortillas! Not to mention my new-found love of spicy foods. And don’t get me started with the lack of quesillo in the U.S. I remember complaining about the food schedule in Mexico, not accustomed to the late time of comida. But now back in the U.S., my stomach consistently growls around 2:30PM, instead of at noon, when everyone else here is heading to lunch. When an employee at a Chinese grocery store was about to bag my purchases, I stopped myself mid-word from saying “gracias, pero no necesito una bolsita”. I respond to every sneeze with a “salud”. Although I’m technically on break and not in school, I know I will miss the more relaxed mentality in Mexico. Personally speaking, in the U.S., people put a lot on their plates, and they become very stressed and busy. I like being punctual, but it was a luxury aliquoting time to really take in the environment and to be aware of the surroundings. Being in Mexico made me aware of my anxiety in the U.S. over rushing to the next item on my schedule and making sure I was on time. Luckily, my stay in Mexico has taught me to enjoy the moment rather than always preoccupying over the future plans. And what my heart aches for the most is the time spent with everyone–seeing my group of friends during lecture, eating comida together, walking to Lulu’s for dinner, chatting and drinking at Txalaparta. I have never spent so much time with friends in such a short period of time. Being with everyone allowed me to bond with others and appreciate their unique, cute characteristics: Hershey’s quirky dancing, Pedro’s expressive faces, Iman’s makeup finesse, Juan’s straightforwardness, Rebecca’s little-miss-sunshine positivity, Alejandro’s sarcasm, Jame’s warming smile, Josh’s cool attitude, Bonnie’s social flair, Esme’s chivalry, Brian’s caring protectiveness, April’s rightfulness as queen, Foozer’s sass, Tony’s joy in watching people trip, Matteo’s compassionate listening, Connie’s remorseless shopping prowess, Irfan “innocence”, Devon’s generosity. I really miss it all. I can’t wait to see everyone again in Davis and continue our journeys with this incredible experience behind us.